Life, The Universe and Small Things all covered in one friendly blog.
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25 August, 2008

Olympics 2012

Well that's it, the Olympics are over and now we are "counting down to 2012". Fantastic!

The prime minister is over the moon and all his advisers are rushing to him, "Gordon, Gordon, quick jump on the back of these people's success and make some speeches so people forget what a plonker you are".
So Gordon made a speech about how everyone is celebrating all the medals, there he goes again assuming he knows what people think.

I am not a fan of the Olympics, I mean just look at the hand over at the end. They have really set the tone, a bus and bloody Beckham. How was that supposed to represent London and the UK. Come on the local am-dram could have come up with something better.

Yes I know, It did one thing, it shows the world what they will be standing waiting for when they are trying to get to the 2012 games and all that was missing was "Rail Replacement Service" on the front.

I try to understand I really do, but what were all the people in London and Scotland actually celebrating with all there little Olympic flag waving and shouting.
I was walking through London on Sunday morning and there were people all over the place with bags full of plastic flags. What for? Maybe the truth is that they were found leaving night clubs and promised a free vodka if they went up the Mall and waved a flag.

Some of the paper headlines today are counting down to 2012. It is probably only me, but 2012 is 4 years away, and if you hype it up from now on by the time we get there it can only ever be an anti-climax, cant it?

21 August, 2008

UK Recession. Green your way into one.

The country, we are are told, is going into recession. The boom days are over and GDP and TCP or whatever it is they measure is falling. Growth is at a stand still and if we are not careful things will be as bad as they were the last time things were bad. Crikey!

I have the answer to why this is happening, I won't even charge the Government millions of pounds consultancy for this information, its here free.


Yes that's it, it is as simple as that and here are a few of the reasons why:-

1) "Don't throw things away if they can be repaired". This means people won't need to buy so many new things which means less demand for good which means less retail spending which mean less manufacturing needed therefore less jobs in retail and manufacturing and then less jobs in transport.

2) "Reduce your carbon footprint" This is obviously going to have a huge impact with less need to replace cars so the car industry will have to get smaller, less call for new heating systems so more manufacturing closing down, less call for everything using energy so in the medium term there will be less demand for oil so the oil industry can lay some people off too.

3) "Don't use plastic bags" That's a whole load of jobs down the pan in one swipe.

I could go on but I think you get the idea. The more "Green" you are the less you need, the less you need the fewer jobs, the fewer jobs the quicker we slide into recession.

The money people go on about the need to sustain growth in the economy. But continued growth forever is impossible. There is only so much stuff that people can ever need and once they have it all that's it, no more growth.

The only way to prevent a recession is to forget Green, forget the carbon footprint rubbish and go waste as must of everything as you can.

Its your choice, lots of trash, lots of CO2 or no job and recession.

19 August, 2008

Team GB Olympic Gold

I have done well, it has been on for over a week and this it the first time I have blogged about it. The Olympics, come on, they have to be one of the most pointless wastes of money ever.

There, I have said what millions of people in this country think.
Despite the media telling us how fab team GB are and that they have won more gold than the last time they won this many is there really any point to it all.

All we hear about is "come 2012" this will happen and that will happen. It has got so bad that commentators are almost saying "well yes you got a gold today, but what about 2012 do you think you will win there". No sorry, they are not almost saying it they actually are.

The hype and spin in order to make us forget that something over £9billion will be wasted in the UK for 2 weeks in 2012 is amazing. Yesterday a radio interview revealed that each Olympic competitor gets in the region of £100,000 a year from lottery grants and an undisclosed amount from the tax payer. Then today there is the headline that we need another £100million for training for 2012. No we don't, we need to spend some money on the country, rail, roads, hospitals, schools, policing.

Its nice saying here you are have loads of money to go learn how to sail, or ride a bike around in circles. In fact just spend the next 4 years riding a bike, but what boring people they must become.
They are not dedicated they are obsessive, no time to do anything because they have to train and train and train for a race in 2012. Unless your totally mental no one spends 4 years training for a ride around a track, or to wobble about on a gym horse.

Does the country gets better if some obsessive bunch of girls win a silver medal rowing a boat then cry about it, or some woman rides her horse "awfully well".
It will soon be over, then Gordon Brown will be there to accept the flame or something. That's will be nice for him, its a shame that both he and the awful Tessa Jowell stand about as much change of having a job by 2012 as the bunch of crying women stand of winning a gold.

There is one thing that will be carried on from theses game to 2012, you can bet that everything used at the 2012 games will also have printed on it "Made in China"

15 August, 2008

CO2 - The Scientist is not always right.

Regular readers will know my views on CO2 and global warming.
For anyone who is reading the blog for the first time its is basically this, the planet is warming, it has been since the ice age or else we would all be under ice, CO2 has diddly squat to do with it.

So there you have it, I believe in global warming, its obvious isn't it.
Well it seems not. A Mr Charles Williams tells me that I don't believe in global warming and, he says, he is a scientist.

The story is this, I wrote an article for a local mag about the cult calling themselves Transition Towns that are setting up all over the place. They are a group of Eco-warriors who are going to save the planet by moving us all into mud and rock huts and growing a few veg. For anyone who knows about transition towns and says "they are not a cult" I can only say go read the definition of cult.

My article told it as I see it and I am pleased to say a Mr Charles Williams decided to reply the following week.

Unfortunately for Charlie he is rather as his name suggests, a bit of a charlie, and has fallen for the Transition town mantra. He tells me that he believes we can save our town by growing a few veg and fruit that will make us more secure and robust against global warming and peak oil etc. yawn.
I am not sure where these "peak oil low CO2" people are going to get their drinking water, heat, light and sewage processing from but I wish them well living on potatoes and apples.

The thing with Charlie is this, he writes that I " clearly do not believe in global warming".
The problem is that he has never spoken to me, never met me and knows nothing about me. So where does he get his evidence that I don't believe in global warming.

The answer is simple, he is a scientist and like all the CO2 experts, he doesn't need evidence, he just makes it up.

03 August, 2008

Gordon Brown to Resign

Today in the news we hear that 3 of Gordon Brown's cabinet ministers have said he is the best man for the job. They have not however said what the job is, probably collecting trolleys in Tesco.

I have managed to get a copy of the phone call between Gordon Brown and Alistair Darling, Harriet Harman and John Denham when they called to support him:-

"Hello Gordon its Alistair, and Harriet and John, how is the holiday going?"
"Hello you lot, its ok thanks, I keep bumping into those terrible members of the public but when we are back in the house its ok"
"Well we all hope you are having a really nice time, you deserve a good holiday you are such a brilliant person saving the country from the recession and being so fantastic at everything"
"Thank you, I know, I am doing it all for the hard working families"
"Yes we know and you are doing it really well, everyone is behind everything you do Gordon and we know you are just the perfect person for the job, your brilliant"
"Thank you all very much"
"Well enjoy the rest of your holiday Gordon and we can't wait to see you when you get back, lots of love, kissy kissy, hug"

Conversation then continued between the three "Well do you think he will keep us in the cabinet now" , "Yes I'm sure he will, especially as we wrote to the papers saying how good his is to" Do you think we should send him some chocolates" "Yes I think we should , and flowers for his wife" "Yes definitely flowers"
"It's a shame hes such a prat, do you think he will resign"
"I do hope so."

01 August, 2008

Point from the news - Gordon Brown should go.

I tried but I can not let this one go.
David Miliband has made some comments in the news this week, if you don't know what he said then I suggest you skip this blog entry and move on to carrier bags below. If you do know what he said I ask this. There are people in the Labour party who say he should be sacked for even suggesting that he might want to challenge Gordon the clown for leadership.

Hold on, how far is it from sacking someone for suggesting what we all know that Gordon is a moron to having him shot. This country used to be a democracy allowing free speech. If Miliband is sacked it looks like we are definitely a dictatorship.

If anyone dares to disagree with me Ill have your Internet disconnected!