HBOS Lloyds and Financial Meltdown

Some how the banks have lost billions of pounds. I have been looking as I drive about but isn't laying anywhere obvious, I think that many billions would be easy to find.

There is now a problem that we can't know which bank to trust with our money or who is going to go under next. It has all been caused by greed and although a lot of us are losing money there are still plenty of people in the city who are making money by making others lose it. Don't expect me to explain that one but it is apparently going on.

As the Hitch Hikers Guide to the Universe says "DON'T PANIC" I have the solution for you.

Bury your money in my garden.
This is very simple and guarantees you won't lose any money, well probably not.
Go and draw out all your money and bring it to me. I will then put your money in to a Tupperware container, its OK they are waterproof, Ill then dig a hole in my garden and bury it. I will give you a receipt for the money. Problem solved.

If you need money you can call around and for a small fee I will dig up your box and give you whatever money you want from it.
If you have a lot of money and want me to I can lend some of your money to other people who have boxes but don't have enough money for something. They will then pay you back the money plus a little bit extra.

I only have a small garden but I have friends who will also let me put boxes in their gardens and will only charge me a small amount. They are also letting people bury boxes in their gardens so if you need to borrow some money and there isn't enough in my garden boxes they will lend me some from their boxes for a small fee.
Don't worry its all OK if I run out of money they will let me have money to pay you so you will never lose your money.

There is no reason to worry about your money once you have joined my scheme, I guarantee that at any time you need money I should have some here for you.

So, if you wish to use my facilities just drop me an email HBOS@Lloyds.com